RIP Virginia: The Ultimate Price Sexual Assault Victims Pay

Virginia Giuffre fought as long as she could. She died by suicide on Thursday. The abuse directed toward survivors, including on THE LANDING, piles on the trauma

Today we are shocked, but not surprised, by the premature death of Virginia Giuffre at only 41 years old. She was the most prominent sex trafficking victim and survivor to speak out against Jeffrey Epstein and his procurer/sidekick Ghislaine Maxwell. She received a substantial settlement from Prince Andrew, who she accused of raping her as a teenager, a charge he continues to deny.

To think of what Virginia’s children lost is devastating.

Her loss will also be felt by the countless sexual assault, rape and trafficking victims and survivors she helped and supported.

A young Virginia Giuffre, who has died by suicide

I’ve spoken to too many victims and survivors of rape and sexual assault since American Airlines Sten Molin’s victims came forward back in 2021, many of them in the aviation/airline industry, and across the board, they are changed forever. We are changed forever. Victims and survivors are often buoyed, and sometimes saved, by fellow victims who become advocates and use their pain in positive ways.

Virginia did that for other survivors.

And, in a world that’s very uncomfortable with any talk of sexual assault, we are also subjected to cruel taunts and direct threats for daring to speak out and seek justice. After an assault, this abuse piles trauma upon trauma. (More on that below).

Giuffre died on Thursday, April 24, in her farmhouse in Neergabby, Australia.

Her family’s statement reads,

"Giuffre lost her life to suicide, after being a lifelong victim of sexual abuse and sex trafficking," her family said. "Virginia was a fierce warrior in the fight against sexual abuse and sex trafficking. She was the light that lifted so many survivors. Despite all the adversity she faced in her life, she shone so bright. She will be missed beyond measure. The light of her life were her children Christian, Noah, and Emily."

"It was when she held her newborn daughter in her arms that Virginia realized she had to fight back against those who had abused her and so many others," the statement continued. "There are no words that can express the grave loss we feel today with the passing of our sweet Virginia. She was heroic and will always be remembered for her incredible courage and loving spirit. In the end, the toll of abuse is so heavy that it became unbearable for Virginia to handle its weight. We know that she is with the angels."

Giuffre said Epstein and Maxwell trafficked her to rich and powerful men, including Prince Andrew. Maxwell is serving a 20-year sentence in federal prison after being convicted of child sex trafficking in 2021 in connection with Epstein.

After the verdict, Virginia appeared to find some solace:

"My soul yearned for justice for years and today the jury gave me just that. I will remember this day always," Giuffre spoke out on X following Maxwell's verdict. "Having lived with the horrors of Maxwell's abuse, my heart goes out to the many other girls and young women who suffered at her hands and whose lives she destroyed."

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A photo of Ghislaine Maxwell and Prince Andrew with Virginia. Andrew says he never met Virginia.

Thank You, Virginia

The pressure of taking on your assailant when they are rich and powerful is impossible to understand until you’re in the line of fire. Until you stand up against it.

The headwinds people like her face are beyond compare. Trauma can quite literally rewire your brain, and the strength, courage and resilience it takes to untangle that and tell your story means not everyone can do it. Virginia made a difference.

I’ve spoken with a woman who testified about very rich and powerful assailant. She felt the understandable mixture of terror and pride for standing up to him in court, and from her I gained a new appreciation for how difficult that must be.

But in your industry, speaking out against pilots—the celebrities of the aviation world—feels just as scary sometimes.

If you read here, you’ve seen much of the abuse directed at victims for sharing their stories of rape and assault, and at me for being the person who listens to them and gives them another platform when they ask for it.

It’s ugly. One semi-recent example:

A woman who was raped by Sten Molin shared her story on Medium last year. She wrote that she was “despondent” and it was unnerving and alarming, as she didn’t seem OK. She wasn’t bothering anyone. She didn’t name anyone but her rapist, didn’t link to any other accounts that I can see, didn’t go to anyone’s platform.

Yet a stalker known for harasssing and abusing rape and sexual assault victims came to her, and under this woman’s most personal narrative, taunted her—both in the stalker’s own name and with fake accounts to make it seem like there are others who behave this way (more on that in another post).

Taunts to a rape victim who shared her harrowing story on Medium.

Taunts to a rape victim who shared her raw story on Medium.

We have to understand there are a lot of disturbed people out there. The Karen Read trial going on right now is a prime example of the collective psychological dysfunction and damage many human beings are living with. (If you’re not following the trial and its rabid fans on both sides, enter at your own risk).

I was paying a price for believing victims as early as late 2021. In early 2022, my first death threat came through. I did not know at the time that person was going to be a stalker who would chase me down all over the internet, all the way to Goodreads, where readers talk about books and have no interest in hearing from disturbed people whose only goal is to harm survivors.

Death threat sent by email to me.

One of the reasons I posted recently about no longer encouraging paid subscribers is that I’ve realized we’re not going to write our way out of this.

Airline employes are discouraged from making waves, sometimes forbidden to use social media for certain things, and don’t always feel safe lifting, sharing and amplifying the stories of the victims in their industry.

I have joined a network I met through LinkedIn of survivors/victims-turned-advocates. There is a new group forming that is going to try to take action above and beyond sharing and platforming and podcasting and writing.

Like Virginia, activism and paying that support forward is where many of us find our purpose and our peace. For me, it’s also helped to grow a network of support from fellow victims of cyberstalking, which is illegal, and which, eventually, will catch up with you, even if you think you’ve always used a VPN. Your footprint is always, always somewhere, and when you stalk for that long, you will always, always slip up.

Stay tuned.

Thanks for reading and subscribing.

-Sara